Als ich wisse das Morgen der Erde enden wuerde, immernoch wurd ich mein Apfelbaum pflanzen.

Even if I knew the world would perish tomorrow, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

"Factory work's easier on the back, and I don't mind it, understand, but a man becomes what he does. Got to watch that. That's why I keep at farmin' although the crops haven't ever throve. It's the doin' that's important." Madison Wheeler in Blue Highways by William Least Heat Moon

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

If only I'd brought my camera...

A few years ago we started celebrating my Mother's Day on Saturday instead of Sunday.  This means we can honor my Mother-in-Law on Sunday and I don't get grouchy about having to cook dinner on Mother's Day.

I've noticed quite a bit of back lash against Mother's Day out in cyber world lately.  And, I get it, I do.  I know that there is certainly the potential for people who wish to be mothers, or for people who have lost their children to feel hurt.  I hope that those individuals, and all those who are hurting, have people who love and nurture them.  Not just on one day, but every day.  I don't want fancy gifts (but I never really want those).   I don't want to go to an expensive restaurant (in fact, taking the kids to a fancy restaurant is sometimes more stressful than cooking at home).  I don't want to be worshiped and praised all day (a little of that goes a long way).  But, I do want a day off.

Around here there are two days that each of us get to have the day just the way we want it - birthdays and Mother's/Father's Day.  Those days are usually simple.  The Woodsman often chooses to celebrate Father's Day by having a large portion of the day to himself to run without feeling guilty that he's leaving us behind.  Then he likes to get to decide what's for dinner (a decision which is usually firmly in my territory).

On Mother's Day I ask for very little.  I don't want to cook.  I don't want to do laundry.  And I want the house to be clean.  Usually there are some sweet handmade cards and breakfast (which get increasingly better each year as the kids improve their cooking skills).  Often, if the weather is good, there's a hike and maybe a picnic or lunch at a favorite restaurant.

This year everyone let me sleep in (until 8:30 - that's about 4 hours longer than I usually get).  Then they made a breakfast of soppy eggs, bagels with cream cheese, strawberries and coffee.  After breakfast I tooled around on the computer and took life easy while they did their morning chores (supervised by Daddy so I didn't have to fuss at anyone).  Then we headed off to The Boy's soccer game.  After the game we went to a local employee owned restaurant called The Little Grill.  With our bellies full of good food (I had the Tempe Ruben - to die for... yum) we headed off to Shenandoah National Park for an afternoon of hiking some of the waterfall trails.

Here is when I started kicking myself for not bringing the camera.  I would have taken pictures of:
 the glorious waterfalls and sparkling rivers
 the kids dipping their heads in the ice cold streams when they got too hot and the water streaming down their backs
the trillium - pink and white and perfect
the Jack in the Pulpit
the myriads of other wild flowers whose names I don't know (because I also forgot the wildflower identification book)
the sunlight peeking through the trees and making each water droplet look like a little diamond
the kids climbing on every rock they could find and bounding over them like little sure footed mountain goats
the green green green of mosses and fiddle head ferns
the view across the valley with shadows cast on the mountains
the view of the Shenandoah slipping away below with the ripples flashing white foam
the rainbow that came out of the clouds and stretched across the sky to end at the top of Kennedy's Peak
the coffee double chocolate banana strawberry and hot fudged topping ice cream sundays we had for dessert

So, I understand disliking the commercialism of Mother's Day.  I understand not wanting to cause pain in others who might find Mother's Day to be a difficult one.  But, I don't understand not wanting to celebrate and thank our mothers.  Much of what we do for our families isn't glorious and it isn't noticed.  We do a lot that's "behind the scenes".  Everyone craves and deserves the chance to be thanked and to be spoiled just a little.  I think we also disenfranchise our children when we don't give them the chance to share their little efforts.
the pot of dirt sitting under the grow lights that my kids swear has cactus seeds planted
the Acrostic Poem the Boy wrote
the glitter bedecked card created weeks ago by The Girl and carefully hidden then presented at breakfast

We all need to know we're loved.  So, I say, instead of disavowing  Mother's Day why not just love on someone who needs to be Mothered?

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