I feel sad for myself, of course. But I also hurt for my Dad. I want him to be able to have a real good-bye with my Pap. I want my grandfather to die in his own room, surrounded by the people he loves. I don't want him to die this way - confused and in the hospital.
I also hurt for my kids. They love him. They appreciate his humor and they look forward to his stories. I've talked to them about him being so sick. I've tried to prepare them, but this will be the first person they love to die. I suppose you can't ever really prepare anyone for that. How do you help your kids, and father mourn while still mourning yourself?
|Pap on his 99th birthday.|
A Teddy Bear sleeps in his little bear skin.
He sleeps very well I am told.
One night I slept in my bare skin.
Brrr.. all I got was cold.
I love you Pap!